21 November 2009
· Filed under Daily Life, Thoughts & Reflections
In my earlier blog, I said that one main purpose of doing a side-line is to increase income for the family. I guess the other reason is probably for me to explore my creativity. But the main push factor is still the $$$. I need to start something with low costs (or zero costs is even better).
With Inez being added into the family and the cost of having a nanny soon, it means that no more savings at the end of the month. When I received my pay, it will also mean “pay and pay”. No more shopping (not as if I’m a shopaholic) but that means I cannot get new working clothes anymore or a decent pair of shoes for work.. No more facial and massage for me. No more good food (even though is only occasionally that we dine at better places). I felt that I’m walking on tight rope and any additional expenses is going to add on to the burden. Everything now is calculating costs and save (if we can even save in the first place). I hope that this kind of life will not have to continue for long.
God, I want a new job too that pays me at least 30% more than my current.
18 November 2009
· Filed under Daily Life, Thoughts & Reflections
As I stayed at home and laze around occasionally (when baby is asleep), I have been thinking of starting a side line to increase income for the family. The thing is I do not really have a clear idea what I want to do, what are my strengths and how to go about it. Of course it has to be something that I am interested in and/or have a passion for but it cannot take up too much of my time since I will still have a full-time job + I still need to take care of baby even when I go back to work in Feb & I still need to continue taking CG.
I only have a vague idea to either do something related to parenting, babies and/or wedding coordinator.
Selling baby stuff – need a lot of research and contacts
Parenting advice/workshop – hmm???
Wedding coordinator – can do online and provide a service???
Any ideas?
28 October 2009
· Filed under Thoughts & Reflections
We all know that sometimes when we are in a bad or difficult situation, the last thing we need to know or hear is, ” I told you already” or people adding salt to the wound.
It’s not as if we do not know how bad/difficult the situation is, is fine if you do not want to help but don’t give any more negative comments or say such things like, “You should have planned out first” or “Didn’t I tell you so..”
What’s worse is somethings such comments come from your own family/parents. On one hand, you feel like telling them off yet on the other hand, you want to control your temper & not leash out. So, all I can respond is just to keep quiet and not let my anger get the better of me.
In one occasion, they were the one who suggested to have the party and we did raised our concerns over $$. Then they said, just do it first & they will see how they can help. Now due to the tight finances we have, they are saying that we should have done our sums first and we should raise this concern earlier. They keep asking what happen to our finances and why we didn’t save up, etc, etc…
What do you want me to say?
23 October 2009
· Filed under Thoughts & Reflections
Oct is a mth that is crucial to us as a zone & chc but yet is also a mth that I’m not around.
Do I miss Tue mtg? Well, yes and no.
Yes => Miss the atmosphere of P&W with my leaders and the sharing that my ZS shared
No => Is really a break for me (and I’m only human)
As I look forward to going back to service & seeing my CG members, I also wonder how I’m going to cope when I need to take care of baby during maternity leave and taking CG.
And worse, I have yet to find a babysitter/nanny when I get back to work in Feb.
Gosh!! Not to mention that financially very tight..
22 August 2009
· Filed under Daily Life, Thoughts & Reflections
It’s the same old questions again. No sparks, no surprise, no planning being done.
No expectation = no disappointment
3/4 day has gone by just like that.
Not everyone will think and plan like I do, putting in effort and sourcing around.
Mundane, routine => what a day it has been. So sad… 
2 August 2009
· Filed under Thoughts & Reflections
Amazing 11 years – that’s how long I have been in church…
Time flies… Emotions just welled up as the church celebrates our church 20th anniversary. I’m so awed by the 20 pioneers who started the church with Pst & I will never be able to imagine the sweat, tears, blood, sacrifices, etc that they have made to lay down their lives for God and to run after the vision that God has given to us. I hope that for those who joined since JW days or even Expo days will catch it in their spirit and the next generation will do even greater works for God.
From a mere member to a tuition teacher in children church to a choir member to a choir IC and eventually now as a CGL – these are the ministries that I have served in. All the experiences have groomed, shaped and developed me as a person and into who I am today.
From a 1st year unit student who stepped into church on 20 Sep 1998 to a working adult to going to SCA in 2002 to going to SOT in 2007 – the last 11 years carries lots of ups, downs, fun, laughter, sweat, tears, bonding, spiritual encounters, understanding what purpose/destiny is, knowing what I can do for God, how I can serve Him and His people – all these are not just memories of the past. They are experiences that I have gone thru with the Lord – they formed part of my life, they will never be erased and will always be footprints in my life.
This is a place where it is more than a church (with buildings). It is a place where I have forged many real friendship – people who have walked with me in my journey, a place where I found my husband, a place where our next generation will be raised (me and dear dear darling princess).
I looked forward to more strong and great years ahead with my family, my friends, my CG, the church.
21 June 2009
· Filed under Daily Life, Thoughts & Reflections
My mum called me yesterday morning at 8am when I was still soundly asleep and she said, “Your auntie has bye bye..” And I thought it was my auntie who stays in Ipoh is returning back to Msia (though I didn’t know that she came to SG). It was only when my mum repeated again then I realized that it’s the auntie who has been sick.
It was pretty sudden although this auntie has kidney problem and had been on the dialysis for a few years. My mum hurriedly ended the call. Still in my sleepy mode, I went back to sleep but I woke up at 9am+ to reality that my auntie has really passed away. I msg one of my cousin & ask what really happened. It seems that she went for an ops 2 weeks ago and then in and out of hospital after the ops, is either the wounds or the kidney got infection and affected the heart.
For the whole of yesterday afternoon, I didn’t really feel like talking until it got dear dear a little worried. Though I have attended my wakes before, the feeling and mood is different when it happened in your extended family. Though I have never been really close to her but it still saddens me as she’s still one of the relatives that I see more often in a year (besides the annual CNY gathering).
Suddenly, I thought to myself that how I regretted not having a chance to pray for her (or rather I think is common for people to undergo dialysis and is not so urgent). I really feel bad and asked myself “Would anything have change if I had prayed for her? Would she have responded to God?” But I never had a chance to ask if she wants to receive Christ as the death came so sudden.
This is yet another challenge or blow that I faced within the last few weeks.
It just suddenly causes me to be more urgent over the salvation of my family members, especially my parents, my brother (who has backslide for many years) and my in-laws. This burden that I really pray and want my family to come to know the Lord.
8 June 2009
· Filed under Thoughts & Reflections
Sometimes, I can’t help but feel that is tough being a woman in the today’s times – having to face many challenges and pressure like work, family, finances, children, etc, etc, etc…
It’s even tougher sometimes when you feel that you are going thru it alone with no one you can turn to & you don’t want to share with your parents cos you do not want them to worry.
I feel that I’m working so hard everyday at work, working till the late hours, staying back for OT yet the money is not enough to pay the bills, the loans instalment, the daily necessities. Many things that I wished I can buy for myself, they all have to be put aside to be sacrificed. Indeed, SG is pretty hard to survive with just a single income. What’s more I don’t really feel the support (whether in action or in the emotions) that I needed the most from the one that I hope to see. Does he really feel and know my heart?
As much as I know that He is the source and the provider, I’m also a normal human being who needs to see the hands of God moving though I trust His heart.
With so much challenges in this season of my life – wanting to grow the cg, having to think and provide solutions for the problems that mbrs face (have to help them find job, counsel them, encourage them), worrying everyday where and when the finance is going to come in to pass to Ric…,when is dual income coming in, stress and pressure at work, the baby that is coming…Yet despite all these challenges, I’m still expected to encourage, inspire and impart faith every week to the sheeps under my care.
That’s only that much that I can take…
23 May 2009
· Filed under Thoughts & Reflections
Lying on bed,tossing and turning,staring at the ceiling. Though my physical body is very tired,I just can’t seem to fall asleep.
The stress at work,the pressure of ministry,the worry over finances,the concern over the ability to provide for baby – all these cause me to break down. Although I knew all these challenges in my mind & heart, it seems clearer to me especially when I’m alone.
With puffy eyes,here I am documenting the thoughts and season of my life. As I wonder and ponder and ask God, I’m reminded of a old song that we used to sing & the chorus goes like that:
And I will go to your secret place
Bow my knees to Your glorious throne
Have Your way in my heart
O Lord, have Your way
8 February 2009
· Filed under Thoughts & Reflections
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