Little Lamb Rachel

Finally the uneasy uncomfortable feeling from the Trimester 1 is easing away and I be stepping into Trimester 2. With that, I just hope that everything will be smoother throughout the remaining months of the pregnancy journey.

During Trim 1, I was feeling nauseous and always hungry but yet I cannot eat a full meal as my digestive system was not able to take it. Besides that, I was always feeling tired too, what’s more there are still 2 kiddos to entertain when I come back from work and during weekends. Working, 2 active toddlers, CG, daily mundane of life really drained my energy and there are just some days that I just feel like not doing anything and lie in bed.

Maybe it’s age that catching up, that’s why this pregnancy does not seem as easy as the first two. I had no nauseous feeling or any major discomfort and was still full of energy for the first two. What’s more I was still on the way to losing my weight from Inez’s birth and I became pregnant again with Alvez. Yet, the physical body didn’t seem to weight as heavy.

Number. 3 is at week 13 now and at 7cm long. Baby seems to grow super fast from the scan that I saw today. In just a month, baby seem to have balloon. My gosh, am wondering if  baby is going to be bigger than Alvez.

Anyone wants to guess the sex?

YUP!!! They are my ANGELS!!!

Sometimes, I wonder what will I do without them?

Having raised me and my brother for the last 20 over years, they have their own story to tell in their parenting style and I believe their fair share of heartaches, pain, joy, laughter, bonding, etc, etc in raising  us.

Now that I’m a parent myself, I suddenly find myself understanding them better and appreciating them even more. And our relationship grew even stronger with the grandchildren that are added into their life. They are first time grandparents and I believe that they are also learning, much as they are happy and excited with the 2 kiddos.

My mum quit a rather easy job of helping to clean office and that only requires her to work a few hours Monday to Friday. Because of me, she comes over to my place, rain or shine, to help with the kids. Looking after 2 kids (together with my helper) is no joke and it’s more tiring for her. Though there are times that she complain when the kids are naughty, she will still be at my place the same time the next morning.

My dad is the “24 hour doting grandpa” as quoted by my mum. Once Inez calls him to buy cheese, Bovril, biscuits, the next day, you can see my mum bringing the stuff over. My dad super dotes on the 2 kids…

My dad super loves me too! I told my mum that I like to get a Xmas tree this year but was worried that the kids will destroy it and I don’t want to spend so much $$$ on it. When my mum told my dad about it, immediately, he went about asking the tenants at his workplace where they got their Xmas trees. Not only that, he and my mum went to buy it, bring it over to my place and he even bought the decors. What more can I say?

Thank God for them!

This photo was taken 3 years ago and my parents have aged, especially my dad whose grey hair are getting more and more.

God, I just pray that you preserve them, keep them healthy & strong and most importantly, they will come to know You soon as their personal Lord and Savior. I am still standing on the promise that when one is saved, the whole household will be saved. If you read this, say a little prayer for them, ya? Thanks

Papa, Mama, I love you guys lots!!!

The season if indulgence, giving and remembering the goodness of my Savior is slowly but surely getting nearer.

How I wish I can not worry about spending money and bring gifts for everyone.

How I wish I can shop non-stop at Watson’s sale.

How I wish I can shop non-stop at Sasa.

How I wish I can have my collagen drink everyday and not worry about the costs.

How I wish I can have my facials and spas every month.

How I wish I can have my chiropractic treatment every month for my aching back and waist.

How I wish I can go for a holiday every year and not worry about the expenses.

How I wish I can get whatever stuff for my kids.

How I wish I don’t have to count the penny and dollars before I make any purchase.

How I wish I can have impulsive buying.

How I wish my D will earn more and hopefully higher than me.

How I wish I don’t have to worry so much every month over the household.

How I wish…for many many more things…

But the truth is we live in a real world and I live in a real world. Every single dollar that I have goes to my household expenses, the loans, the kids, etc. Sometimes, it can get tiring and very not motivated when you don’t see expenses decreasing and income increasing. It may seem like a complaint but hey, I need to let go so that I can regain some sanity and balance in my life.

It’s not easy and I always pray that better days will come in His timing. Whenever I hear of peoples’ testimony on how God turned their lives around, especially those with kids and how they struggled initially but as they continued to put Him first, the blessings and breakthroughs start coming in. I’m counting to our days too when we can be like them, sharing our story and testimony.

Nonetheless, I am still praying, hoping and believing that next year will be better and greater. I am praying that my blogshop can take flight and be a platform that can bless someone.

Sometimes I cannot help but feel and think that parenting is an oxymoron business.

When I look at my babies, on one hand, I hope that they will grow up quickly so that I can bring them to Science Centre, Night Safari, etc and some other places that they can appreciate and have fun. But on the other hand, I secretly hope that they will stay at this current stage where they need me and they love for me to hug, squeeze and kiss them.

Inez is at this stage where she wants to self feed herself. On one hand, I want her to quickly master the art of self-feeding but whenever I see her play with the food, fiddle with the spoon and the mess she creates, I would want to feed her myself so that she can quickly finish.

If it is possible, I will want to bring my kids for this enrichment and that class or whatsoever, like how some other parents will enroll their kids for different classes. But one has to be also practical even in parenting. I am not that rich to be able to bring my kids for such classes. Though I don’t really think that they will lose out much but still I will worry if they won’t be able to catch up when they go school.

I can finally understand why my mum always say that parents are always worrying about their children, no matter how old they have grown.